Angry Pix

The world has been doing a fairly decent job of pissing off the Pix lately, and it's time for a little venting. It's nothing major. No disturbances in the force, just a little sand in the proverbial vagina. Not that the bible consists of any proverbs that reference vaginas, just using a colloquialism.

Let's start with last Sunday.......what the hell was that? What WAS THAT?!?! Who the? What the? Oy vey. Gevald. As Monsieur J. Tedford would say, "That just happened". The Pix would like to thank the Pats for showing up, but........well, they really didn't. The Pix reall didn't think last weeks reference to the Red Sox would be that predictive. Wow. This just in, the Ravens just picked off Brady again. And Randy Moss? Paging Randy Moss? Please report to the ticket counter. Moss showed less effort than a 10 dollar hooker. On Meth. Let's just move on...

What the hell is NBC doing? Really? Jay Leno? Why not just bring back Arsenio Hall?
Leno is 1/20th as funny as Conan. It was bad enough that the network was too cheap to continue "ER" and stuff Chin "O" in the 10 pm slot, but now you are moving Conan?
Good for him for hazing you in public before he bolts for Fox. Dear NBC: You suck.

Speaking of Fox, Sarah Palin??????????? Really???????? Now that even more information is coming out regarding this moron's lack of qualification to hold public office (not knowing why there is a North AND South Korea), the Pix would like to officially thank John McCain for setting back the Republican party two generations. You know what? This isn't funny. Moving on again........

Mark McGuire? Really? You used steroids? In other news, water is wet, Siberia is cold, and Pam Anderson has fake tits. And Really? You only took low dosages because you didn't want to appear too big? Really? You looked like 3 lbs of sausage stuffed into a peanut shell. You dumbass.

And really PETA?? (People for the ethical treatment of animals, or as the Pix likes to call it...people for eating tasty animals) You are running a print ad of porn star Sasha Grey with the language "Too much sex can be a bad thing". What are you talking about? The Pix has no idea what that means....what's your message? Thanks for the picture of Sasha's butt anyway....

And really drug company? The Pix saw a commercial the other day for some child depression drug on TV. It said, "If your child is between the ages of 7 and 17 and experiences frequent sadness, social isolation, an increase in anger, difficulty in school...then your child may be struggling with depression". Dr. Pix says, "Or your child may be a child". Welcome to life. It doesn't get any easier. Have a lollipop.

Let's take a break for an important public service anouncement that arrived via email to the Pix yesterday from the webside, WebMD....seriously, this article came out yesterday and can be confirmed by the official wife. The article was titled "why men
like porn". The gist if the article is that scientists say that men are hard wired to react to visual stimulus due to evolution. As we evolved, males had to be able to become aroused instantly for the propogation of the human species. Makes sense, no?
If we warmed up as slowly as the herd, a tiger might come along and eat us before we could.....propogate. Once again, science and the Pix have come together. Delicious.

San Diego 31, Jets 10
Dallas 31, Vikings 20
Indy 31, Balt 17
New Orleans 31, Arizona 28
Whatever....

Back to the suck....Martha Coakley is about to become a Senator. She is. She is going to win next week's election by 10 points. Because the state of Massachusetts is corrupt and incredibly lame and stupid. It is public record that she kept an innocent man in prison (Gerard Amirault) knowing the charges against him were sheer fabrication. Google it. Dorothy Rabinowitz won a Pulitzer for her article in the Journal covering the case from the 80's. It's PUBLIC RECORD. SHE KEPT AN INNOCENT MAN IN JAIL. And she will win. By 10 pts. That is some stinky cheese right there. Thanks again, Mass holes.

Lastly, and the Pix apologizes for Angry Pix this week...get thyselves to "American Idol", and look for my boy "Ski Bo ski". He's this year's Norman Gentle. Only funnier. And authentic. He told the judges his name is "Ski bo ski, baby, yeahhhhhhhhh. And you have to pronounce the yeahhhh". When informed that the shirt he was wearing only said "Ski bo", he replied, "that's what discounts are for, baby". He then proceeded to spell "Ski bo ski" for the judges, "S-k-i-i-o-b-o-s-k". He was then informed that that really doesn't spell "Ski bo ski". To which he replied, "Yeahhhhh". Alrighty then..

Angry Pix out.