The PIX- 10/3

What a week. Really. Totally insane. John Paul Sartre famously wrote that "Hell is other people". He would really have hated living in 2008.
Let's try to lighten things up a little, shall we? Official wife and the Pix tuned into the VP debate last night hoping for some high comedy.
After watching clips of the Katie Couric interview all week, the Pix half expected the lipstick pit bull to feint, run out of the room crying or maybe just open the debate by saying "I'm sorry, I just can't do this." Instead she.....well....she proved once again that she can read and that she would make a moderately decent local tv anchor, as long as someone taught her how to correctly pronounce the word "nuclear". The Pix honestly can't understand how this person could be this close to becoming President. Which leads us to this week's theme: Things the Pix doesn't get....

1. Washing the outside of the car. I don't get it. Isn't that what the paint is for? I mean, you bought the paint, right? Doesn't it keep the rain and sun and dirt and salt and all that stuff out of the inside of the car? Whenever the Pix drives by the car wash and sees people actually waiting in line, wasting their time and then paying for a car wash....I just think what a colossal waste of time. And some people go like once a week. I don't get it.

2. Clothes with writing on the butt. I don't get it. The only logical thing I can think of to print on the rear of a pair of pants or shorts is "hey, look at my a#$". And isn't that redundant? And while we are on female fashion, could someone please wake me up when the over size sunglass look goes out of style again? Please? I appreciate it. And let's just skip the tattoo and piercing comments. You know how the Pix feels about that, right?

3. Making the bed. Is there a more useless exercise than making the bed?

4. People who ask "what kind of salad dressing do you have?" How many types are there? Like 5 majors, right? And shouldn't anyone over the age of 13 have a pretty well established dressing of preference and a fairly automatic back up? It's not like the FDA is going to approve a new and revolutionary dressing overnight. And even if they did it's unlikely the "Muffin Shop" would have it yet. Italian, Russian, Blue Cheese, Ranch, Oil and Vinegar and most likely some bull $h)t diet vinaigrette. That's it. That's the list. (maybe Greek or tangy tasty parmesan peppercorn, but that's it)

5. Fish tacos

6. People who think drinking alone constitutes a problem. The Pix has said this before, but it warrants repeating....you are not drinking alone if the TV is on.

7. Pole Vaulting. I get the Olympic sport, I just don't get where it comes from. Let's assume most of the original Olympic sports were born of some military use. Running. Throwing a big stone. Throwing a spear.
I get those. But let's say you invented pole vaulting and you use it in a battle and successfully vault yourself into the enemy's castle. Then what? You're hosed. And you're dead. And I can't imagine any of your buddies are going to want to go next. It just doesn't make sense. I don't get it.

8. Hollow chocolate Easter bunnies. Why don't they make solid ones any more? Isn't half the pleasure of biting into the bunny's head the reassuring knowledge that you have this huge piece of candy and you're
only one bite into it? And then you feel the hollow crumbles break
apart and you realize you have been gypped. Easter is lame enough as it is. Until the lamb dinner. Ummmmm. The Pix loves lamb with some nice mint jelly and mashed potatoes with lamb gravy....

9. Musical guests on SNL. The Pix originally thought the best part of tivo was fast forwarding through the commercials. That has been far surpassed by having the ability to fast forward through the worst 4 minutes of TV every week. (And now the band plays twice!). Dear Mr.
Michaels, I watch your show for cheap humor and the occasional mean spirited barb. Not to be reminded on weekly basis just how bad music has become. I don't get it. Thanks, The Pix.....

Last week, bye. Two weeks ago, 10-6. Total for season 32-14 against the spread. (for entertainment purposes only)


Tenn -3 over Bal
NY -7 over Sea
Philly -5 over Wash
SD -7 over Mia
Chi -3 over Det
GB no line over ATL
Indy -3 over Hous
Carolina -10 over KC
Denver -3 over TB
Buff + 2 over AZ
NE -3 over SF
Dallas -17 over Cin
Jax -4 over Turd
NO -3 over Minn

Bonus Pix....Red Sox in 4, TB in 4, LA in 4 and Philly in 4.

Special Pix prediction....McCain wins less than 15 states in November.
Right now he leads in poles in 24. Check out Intrade.com for that info.

New item for the Pix......TV trivia. Each week the Pix will reveal the winner (whoever emails the correct answer 1st) and have some sort of award for winning the season (probably a cold can of deliciousness)

What is the name of the beverage that Grandpa would sneak off and drink with the Baldwin sisters? No Google!

Next week......the return of the ovarian consultant.

Pix out.